Is 10 years long enough?

Thursday, December 10, 2009

10 things I wish I knew 10 years ago:

1. When you vow "For better or worse" you must mean both ways. In reality there will be better times, but there will also be worse times. If you are going through a "worse" time remember that a better time will come.

2. The first year of your marriage may not be the most difficult (as I had read it was before we were married) - in reality for us it was our seventh year.

3. Love is a choice. There are those wonderful days when you are happily & blissfully in love with your spouse & there are other days when you grit your teeth & say " I choose to love ___(insert husband's full name)____". - chose to make that choice daily.

4. Pray, pray, pray together. One positive outcome of our most difficult 7th year was that we learnt to pray together daily. Before that we had both had our own relationships with God & prayed as individuals, yet I believe God loves to have spouses pray together & it certainly helped strengthen our marriage.

5. Daily devotions is a must. God is the source of true wisdom & strength that will help you through each & every day - you chose to tap into this strength or not. Trust me it's easier leaning on his strength than trying to go on your own. A relationship with God is without a doubt the most fulfilling relationship you will ever experience.

6. Don't expect your new hubby to be like your dad. Yep, poor Dave was continually failing next to my Dad - thankfully Mum pulled me aside & said " Dad has many years of experience on Dave - don't expect a 20 year old to be like a 45 year old".

7. Children are a blessing from the Lord. OK so I kinda knew that, but in the last 2 years as I long for more, the ones I am blessed with seem more & more dear to me.

8. Respect your hubby & (gulp) submit to him. Well I was one of those brides who refused - absolutely refused - to have the word submit in my marriage vows. I was an independent, newly qualified professional who was not going to submit to anyone but God. Well let's just say I've learnt the hard way that submission to your husband is actually the better way to live.

9. When you marry someone who is opposite of you - don't expect a dull life!! I am the type of person who would have quite happily stayed in our first house until my Grand kids were grown up. I married an adventurer. It's kinda like a roller coaster ride. Sit down, buckle up, hang on - you don't know what's ahead!

10. Baby weight is hard to lose! - 10 kgs to go until I'm back to my wedding weight - sure wish it was easier! (OK I probably didn't need to know this one! )

And the answer to my question (which is what I asked everyone who rang us up to wish us Happy 10th Anniversary)

Happy Anniversary Dave!
I love you now more than ever!!


aunty sel said...

It's so hard to believe its been ten years!!!! Weren't we all so cute back then....
happy anniversary,

Ana said...

What a lovely post Renata, our anniversary is also coming up and this post has encouraged me so much. I agree with you in all of the above. Congratulations! xoxo

A Bite of Country Cupcakes said...

Well they talk of the 7 year itch...Mabey it is the tough year?
I find my Marriage has a huge contentment attatched but it still is lots of work....Most things worthwhile are tho eh? lol!
Enjoy your celebrations

Cassandra-ann said...

Aww, i LOVED this post.
Happy 10 year anniversary! I agree with everything you wrote!
You were such a beautiful bride (you still are ;-) )

I hope you got some special time with Dave and heres to another 10 , 20 , 50 ! great years.

P.S thanks for the congratualtions Renata and all the wonderful comments you always leave on my blog! xx

Sandra said...

Congratulations! My, doesn't time fly. You and Dave are a wonderful couple. Love is more than a feeling, so sometimes we have to work on it before we feel it I have found.
Your wedding was such a special day. Didn't you both look so beautiful/handsome?
And ah, if only I was only 10 kg over my wedding weight. Congratulations on your anniversary!

Mum-me said...

What a beautiful post! Gorgeous wedding photos. Happy Anniversary - 10 years is a real achievement.

Yes, the 7th year was hard for us too and, funnily enough, the 14th too. Must be some sort of cycle.

Saminda said...

I couldn't agree more with all that Renata, what a great post! :) I think our 7th/8th year was a the hardest too, and I know many people say the same.
Have a great night! xo

Kate said...

huuuge congrats you's an exciting and wonderful thing!! here's to the next ten, eh? :) :) love you all heaps xox

Heather said...

You look so lovely! Very good marriage advice, and I agree - our 7th year was the toughest too!

I had always heard that people become dissatisfied during the 7th year, and that was true for us. We actually went to a counselor that year, but now we feel that our marriage is stronger than ever because of it.

Here's to 10 more happy years!

Haf Dozen Reasons....... said...

Happy 10th Anniversary!! What a beautiful bride you were!!

Our tenth year was a struggle. Then our twentieth year too. we are looking forward to our 25th in May. Woo Hoo!

I too am married to an adventurer. What a roller coaster ride it has been. He is slowly learning that after 24+ years of it that my patience is wearing out with it all!! :)

Ann at eightacresofeden said...

Congratulations Renata!
Brett and I celebrate 20 years of marriage on the 30th December.
The only one I cannot identify with is trying to lose baby weight - having been the same weight since I was a teenager and only putting on a little extra during pregnancy which immediately drops off when the baby is born. Right now I need to gain some weight for this baby is small - so please pray that it stays put until Christmas - I'm even prepared to have this baby on Christmas day now!

Skipper said...

:) Happy anniversary Renata!! You were a beautiful bride - and you are just as beautiful now. Dave is a very blessed man to have such a lovely and gracious wife - and you are a blessed woman to have such an amazing man. :)

Congrats on 1 whole decade together as man and wife.

Grandma said...

I never thought of Dave as an adventurer......don't tell him that, though!!!!! Of course, you all looked lovely - and wasn't Nity soooooo cute!!!! Glad you had a lovely time & pray that the coming years will be much blessed for all of you!!!
Lots of love,
Mum xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
ps I love the photo you have at the top of your blog at the moment!!!
pss sorry for not leaving my comment earlier lol

Leanne said...

Love this post.

So so true, all of it...

And you made a smashing bride!

So glad God works with the frayed, broken, yucky fabric of our lives and wants to turn us into something beautiful.


Mummy McTavish said...

Congratulations on 10 years! You were stunning, your dress was beautiful, thanks for sharing your wedding photos with us!

Camille said...

I clicked here through LinkWithin...what a lovely post!! *Loved* the advice your Mom gave you about not expecting him to be like a 45 year old...too funny! I will have to remember that one in years to come, as our little girl ADORES her Daddy! Wonderful list...I could relate to most of what you wrote. And...we are celebrating 20 years this quickly the time passes! :) May the LORD give you MANY more years together for HIS glory!

Many blessings,

Martha said...

And this year would make it...14! I'll congratulate you in Dec *hehe*

How funny, our 7th year was the hardest too!! Or rather, it's not "funny", but just interesting to note. We're going to celebrate 12 years this April :)

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